When most people think of anger it is open aggression that comes to mind. Aggressive anger involves the preservation of personal worth, needs, and convictions at someone else’s expense. This is the category of anger that includes explosiveness, rage, intimidation, and blame. But is not limited to these extreme forms of expression. It can also include bickering, criticizing, griping, and sarcasm. Foul play is usually always guaranteed.
To get an idea of the nature of openly aggressive anger, look over the following statements:
- I can be blunt and forceful when someone does something to frustrate me.
- As I speak my convictions, my voice becomes increasingly louder.
- When someone confronts me about a problem, I am likely to offer a ready rebuttal.
- No one has to guess my opinion; I’m known for having unwavering viewpoints.
- When something goes wrong, I focus so sharply on fixing the problem that I overlook others’ feelings.
- I have a history of getting caught in bickering matches with family members.
- During verbal disagreements with someone, I am likely to repeat myself several times.
- I find it hard to keep my thoughts to myself when it is obvious that someone else is wrong.
- I have a reputation for being strong willed.
- I tend to give advice, even when others have not asked for it.
The more of these statements you can relate to, the more likely you will have an aggressive form of managing anger. Predictably, you will have more than your share of ongoing struggles with relatives and close associates. You probably have emotional insecurities that will need to be addressed so that you can have more rewarding relationships. Life is certain to have frustrations and imperfections, so unless you determine to handle anger more constructively, you can expect many hurts.